Authentic sincerity

“Don’t claim you’re sincere, just be it.”

- Eva Heller

I remember learning how to write letters to people when I was younger. We started every letter with, “Dear [name]”, and ended with, “Sincerely, [name].” I’m not sure I even knew back in the third grade what it meant to be sincere. I knew what it meant to be a rambunctious kid who preferred to goof off in class instead of learn. Sincerity, however, was not a quality I expressed much since I was more concerned about being a kid than I was about treating others with honesty and respect. To say I was rough around the edges would be an understatement.

I slowly learned the importance of being sincere throughout my adolescence and into adulthood. Even though I knew how to be sincere as a teenager and young adult, I reserved my respect and honesty for those who I felt deserved it. Otherwise, I was good at being a sincere asshole when I disagreed with others or they rubbed me the wrong way. Part of me took pride in the fact that I felt I was being authentic with people and not sugarcoating my feelings. People knew where I stood, but looking back I realize how rude I was being through my actions, tone and words.

Photo by Tim Marshall on Unsplash

I now see how mistreating others and not holding back did not win me much favor with those I interacted with. Maybe they knew how I felt, but I was this authentic jerk who left…